Green Teens

Does this young man like to recycle?

Does this young man like to recycle?

Green Teens

So you think you are “green”? Compare yourself with these standards.

Three green stars is the highest rating.


Quit buying new clothes.

Wear 70’s clothes from Salvation Army.

Go naked, even when it’s cold. ***


Buy local produce. Know your famer.

Eat only raw foods. If wheat and beans break your teeth, soak overnight. Never cook.

Grow all your food. Quit school to tend your fields.***

Restrict intake to 1,500 calories. (Restrict human methane production.)

Drink dirty water.


Sell your I-pod. With the money, buy a lamb. Feed the lamb to a wolf. (Save an endangered species.)

Crush your cell phone.

Lights off. Use a head lamp. (Decommission a power plant. Save CO2 emissions. Save spawning salmon.)


Wear clothes five times before laundering.


Turn the thermostat down five degrees.

Keep the heat at 50 degrees.

Never heat the house.***


Call a friend to take you everywhere. (Car pooling stops oil exploration.)

Take public transportation. (Stop the paving of America. Stop the loss of critical habitat. Stop automobile-animal collisions.)

Tell your dad, “Sell the cars.”

Get your driver’s license when you are 25.

Walk everywhere.***

Do not ski.

Do not read. (Stop deforestation).

Don’t buy things or go places.

Live in a crowded city in a high-rise concrete apartment building. (Save open space. Preserve animal migration corridors.)

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